ClashMusic – Brett’s Last Day on Earth…

How would you spend your last day alive? Brett Anderson is chasing an elusive, invisible butterfly…

Where would you like to wake up?

It makes me sad thinking about dying when I can’t think of a time when I’ve loved life more. But if I must go, I’d like to be at home with my family. Not the most original answer but the truth. Our home is the most beautiful and happy place in the world for me. In a hundred years’ time I’ll probably be a pinched, irritated spectre haunting the space-people who live there, startling them over their bionically enhanced breakfasts and miniature pet elephants.

What’s left to achieve on your last day?

Probably writing THE song. Maybe it would reveal itself at such a time, that elusive, invisible butterfly.

How would you spend your afternoon?

Drinking green tea with my wife and listening to Eno’s ‘Music For Airports’.

Who would be at your final dinner?

Again, my family. I’d write a letter to some friends but wouldn’t want to see anyone except the people who are very closest to me. The last thing I’d want to do would be have some big uncomfortable get-together. I’ve got better over the years but still sometimes feel an overwhelming urge to go and shoot myself in the toilet at dinner parties.

What’s on the menu?

A magic death-cheating Christmas dinner with a good bottle of Chateau Margaux.

What would be your biggest regret?

That I never got to play in goal for Algeria.

What is the last song you listen to?

Either Interpol’s ‘NYC’, Bowie’s ‘Warszawa’, or The Tweets’ ‘The Birdy Song’.

What would be your deathbed confession?

That I wasn’t really born as a pantomime horse.

How would you like to die?

Does anyone answer ‘in excruciating agony’? Painlessly of course.

What would be your final words?

I wouldn’t want to compete with Oscar Wilde’s “Either the wallpaper goes or I do.”

What would you have written on your gravestone?

Again, impossible to top Spike Milligan’s ‘I told you I was ill’.

Who would you like to have meet you at the pearly gates of Heaven?

It might be fun to have a game of ‘It’ with Friedrich Neitzche, Edouard Manet, Albert Camus, J.G. Ballard, Jesus Christ and Godber from Porridge.

What’s your vision of Heaven?

I don’t know – but my vision of Hell is being stuck in a revolving glass door in front of a group of fans with iPhones.

If you could be resurrected the next day, what would you come back as?

I think it might be one of the actors from Horrible Histories. They look like they’re really having fun.

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